What's worse is the effect it continues to have on my children....the true "victims". In April my eldest, who has been suffering from severe depression for a long time and refused counseling or help, reached out one last time to his "dad" by texting him one Saturday morning that he had enough and was going to end his life...8 minutes later he was taken out of the garage by police, where he was attempting to hang himself while I was at work. I'm thankful his younger brother was quick to call 911 and that the response was immediate. And the text that was sent? Wasn't answered or even acknowledged at all UNTIL 2 days later in sleep deprived and SEVERE ANGER on my part, I posted a VERY public and well deserved nasty post on the "Dad's" (loosely used term as he has done nothing in the last 8 years to even deserve that title) Facebook page from his son's mobile FB app, the very same son that at that time was in a Psychiatric facility and finally getting the help his so needed. The end result was a very scary situation ended up forcing the help and needed counseling my son had to finally accept to heal and move on. He wrote a very touching and to the point letter to his "Dad" while in there and it was basically the last communication he has had. He finally got to express that he is tired of the constant disappointment from false or broken promises, out right lies and BS excuses for not being there or not even living up to his obligations, and for not even caring to BE A DAD in anyway. To bad his "dad" still didn't get the message after all that.
It is October now and still can not get any "enforcement". Last "Attempt" was on July 18, and as of today is still over $43,000 in arrearages. I have taken suggestions seriously and created a Facebook page. I hope that everyone will at least visit, friend the page, or even just "like". We need to get our voices back out there and push for changes in the system....I would love to see Social Media as part of proof (lets face it, pretty easy when most dead-beats confess like my ex their employment, joke about how they "screw" the ex and essentially the "system"), and other information that is pertinent to the FOC case. Also, tighter enforcement actions (90 days of not payment is ridiculous before anyone in the FOC system will even look into possible Show Cause)...it is a COURT ORDER, and should be given NO more then 40 (give only a 10 day "grace" period). Automatic license suspension, this can be done by linking FOC to DMV records, after all they are ALL a Michigan government ran agencies. Tougher and more linked FEDERAL tracking of non-custodial parents. This not just a Michigan problem, and may dead-beats flee to other states and there are no repercussions.
PLEASE, go to the Facebook page and join, post, share, and like...we need to keep fighting in order to be taken seriously and get changes not only for our cases, but the many more the happen every year. Thanks for hanging in there!
This week I learned that my Ex is in the Hospital...my kids can't understand why I don't care. Well, it's been 8 years and many serious incidences that HE has not cared...why should ANY of us now? He doesn't DESERVE IT! Yes, I am bitter...you know what...I have a right. I fight everyday, work 7 days a week (sick, in pain, tired...doesn't matter) if I miss a day for any reason, I will fall behind again on something. That is my life. And almost everyday, if I can't manage (but I somehow do, and not sure how) deliver what they need, then the kids are quick to remind me that I am a loser. Example this week...I can't afford for either to take driver's training (insurance is hard enough and I only have PLPD) if they go through normal life and get their license, then I will have to once again, lose my insurance and go illegally without it, because I won't be able to afford it. Can't make them understand that...to them, I'm a BITCH that denies them a NORMAL life. Turn it around...I'm a stressed out, tired beyond belief mother, that maybe, just maybe, the ex would pay 1/3 of his monthly obligation (dream on), I might be able to give them a normal life...But this is life and I am eternally a Loser according to my KIDS.
ReplyDeleteI have for so long studied the "Court Order's". I read them, over and over again, and have come to realize...Once signed by a Circuit Court Judge, it is a legal and binding document that state's: the ___ amount is due every month (30 days). Does not state "possible amount, minimum due, best attempt". This is the amount due...PERIOD. If you DO NOT pay this, it is CONTEMPT OF COURT AND PUNISHABLE BY LAW. Well, It is clear that FOC see's this as "just a piece of paper" and THERE IS A VERY OBVIOUS GRACE PERIOD...CALLED 90 DAYS. DIDN'T SEE THAT IN THE FINE PRINT...PLUS DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING LESS IS ACCEPTABLE! So why is it happening every 31 days and the payor is not held in contempt? Please let us all know if anyone can explain this. All I know is in any other court...let's say for example...you get a DUI...you don't pay, attend your REQUIRED classes, do whatever else is ORDERED within the TIME ORDERED...you are back to jail, don't pass go, don't collect $200!!! Share and Like if you agree...Please help promote this site...I promise it will make a difference to someone in your life, even if you don't realize it!
ReplyDeleteTaken off my Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/MiFriendOfTheCourtChangeNeeded?ref=stream